Paraphernalia
Feb. 11th, 2006 08:36 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
green_amberIf you are lost, are you "searching"? Does one necessarily follow from the other?
Inspired not by existential angst but by the Jihari Window thing going round LJ - which I will definitely do as soon as I'm compos mentis. As I said to![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
tamaranth, I'm such a sucker for this kind of thing - the only thing any better would be to actually be able to read people's thoughts. I don't know why I have such an urge to know what people actually think of me - when experience shows it only ends in tears :-)
But yes, as was pointed out there, is it really of any actual use when there almost no negative words supplied? Is the feeling that no one will do it if words like selfish, depressed, anxious were included? Do any of you OS nuts know how to tweak it?
So yes I'm back in rainy dark ol Scotland. Brr, it's cold, and conveniently, I caught a pouring cold from the guy next to me on the plane and began sneezing uncontrollably one hour out from Heathrow. Why, anyone would think I was allergic to the UK:-)My nose is already Rudolf red, though luckily my face is so brown you can hardly tell. Hah!
Back to celebrity ice dancing, conveniently scheduled to keep me awake, but with no Cpt Jack anymore. Sniff. Haven't they all come on though? I saw the US version in Florida and it wasn't nearly as good - Americans are so naturally glitzy there was none of the stiff likeableness of David Seaman, embarrassed at being seen by his mates going to ballet classes, or the Brit-grit trooperness of Bonnie Langford. Sometimes being British can be good!! (Who would have thought it!) And any min now I can go back and watch the Olympic pairs. Wow, it's just like being back in the 80s and the hey day of Torvill and Dean!!
So, back to life, back to reality. No reaction at all from work about my email before I left, announcing move to Southampton. Not from boss or boss's boss or even Hector, my referee and supposed mentor. Best Pal says no gossip about it going round. No one has told anyone, it seems. It's deeply weird. How am I meant to deal with this? Do I write a formal letter of resignation? Do I tell everyone? Do I send an email round? It feels like I died or something, and no one noticed. I realise that I've only ever properly left one job, and it was my first so no real need to mark its passing - two others I ran away from under a cloud, not daring to look back - it occurs to me that I am just about as bad at leaving jobs as leaviong relationships.. how are you meant to handle this stuff? I feel a need for Declaratory Gesture but I also feel (a) embarrassed (yes, v British) and (b) prone to hiding in case someone talks me out of it again.. (This is also going to be only my fifth ever Proper Job in 20 years of working. How weird is that for someone of my, er, esteemed years?)
OK more skating!!
Inspired not by existential angst but by the Jihari Window thing going round LJ - which I will definitely do as soon as I'm compos mentis. As I said to
tamaranth, I'm such a sucker for this kind of thing - the only thing any better would be to actually be able to read people's thoughts. I don't know why I have such an urge to know what people actually think of me - when experience shows it only ends in tears :-) But yes, as was pointed out there, is it really of any actual use when there almost no negative words supplied? Is the feeling that no one will do it if words like selfish, depressed, anxious were included? Do any of you OS nuts know how to tweak it?
So yes I'm back in rainy dark ol Scotland. Brr, it's cold, and conveniently, I caught a pouring cold from the guy next to me on the plane and began sneezing uncontrollably one hour out from Heathrow. Why, anyone would think I was allergic to the UK:-)My nose is already Rudolf red, though luckily my face is so brown you can hardly tell. Hah!
Back to celebrity ice dancing, conveniently scheduled to keep me awake, but with no Cpt Jack anymore. Sniff. Haven't they all come on though? I saw the US version in Florida and it wasn't nearly as good - Americans are so naturally glitzy there was none of the stiff likeableness of David Seaman, embarrassed at being seen by his mates going to ballet classes, or the Brit-grit trooperness of Bonnie Langford. Sometimes being British can be good!! (Who would have thought it!) And any min now I can go back and watch the Olympic pairs. Wow, it's just like being back in the 80s and the hey day of Torvill and Dean!!
So, back to life, back to reality. No reaction at all from work about my email before I left, announcing move to Southampton. Not from boss or boss's boss or even Hector, my referee and supposed mentor. Best Pal says no gossip about it going round. No one has told anyone, it seems. It's deeply weird. How am I meant to deal with this? Do I write a formal letter of resignation? Do I tell everyone? Do I send an email round? It feels like I died or something, and no one noticed. I realise that I've only ever properly left one job, and it was my first so no real need to mark its passing - two others I ran away from under a cloud, not daring to look back - it occurs to me that I am just about as bad at leaving jobs as leaviong relationships.. how are you meant to handle this stuff? I feel a need for Declaratory Gesture but I also feel (a) embarrassed (yes, v British) and (b) prone to hiding in case someone talks me out of it again.. (This is also going to be only my fifth ever Proper Job in 20 years of working. How weird is that for someone of my, er, esteemed years?)
OK more skating!!
